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BrianHoovenSecondPaper 3 - 21 Jun 2013 - Main.BrianHooven
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Skill, Power, & Fulfillment
Introduction | |
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< | “Power, skill, and fulfillment.” Ever since my last-minute transition from medicine into law, I have known that was what I wanted to get out of my professional life. For me, power and skill are closely related, and each is a means to an end. I consider power to be the set of all those external conditions, money, connections, and status that are helpful to achieve one’s ends. Skill is the set of all the internal resources like perception, persuasion, and efficiency with power. Fulfillment is a more difficult concept for me. I have always known that I wanted to help people, hence my original draw to medical school. However, the medical field simply had no appeal to me beyond its opportunity to help people. Thus I pursued my passion in philosophy and argument, and went to law school, where the opportunity to develop my skills, and be placed in a position to attain power, greatly appealed to me. And I hoped that I would be able to find fulfillment. | >
> | “Power, skill, and fulfillment.” Ever since my last-minute transition from medicine into law, I have known that this was what I wanted to get out of my professional life. For me, power and skill are closely related. Skill is the internal set of abilities that one can develop, such as perception, persuasion, and aptitude in argument. Power is the set of external factors, money, connections, and status that are necessary for one to optimally exercise their skills. Fulfillment is a more difficult concept for me. I have always known that I wanted to help people, but the challenge was to find a way to help people while doing something I liked. Thus I pursued my passion in philosophy and argument, and went to law school. Through law, I hoped to enjoy the development of my skills and power and somehow find a way to help people in the process. I hoped that through this approach, I would be able to find fulfillment. | | | Law School Blinders | |
<
< | My first semester in law school played a nasty trick on me, for the first time, I failed to realize that there was an “outside.” I was trapped inside this very carefully constructed world that promised skill and power through prestigious professors and lofty salaries. This was made worse by the fact that I thought I did see the “outside.” I thought by seeing through all the feel-good assemblies, and realizing that the law school was, in its most basic form, a business designed to package us, that I saw through the veil. I understood that I was a product being made, and I was okay with it because I would be made into a skillful powerful attorney. I arrogantly thought that I was already seeing outside. I was wrong. | >
> | My first semester in law school played a nasty trick on me- it made me forget why I came to law school. Through a series of events that I now describe as “corporate brainwashing,” I was manipulated and packaged into the typical Columbia Law Student. The worst part was that I thought I was avoiding this trap. I saw my friends being pushed towards a goal that I never intended for myself, and I didn’t realize that it was happening to me as well. I forgot about all my ambitions to improve the world and got right in line to sell myself for $160,000 a year. Power and skill had been dangled before me, and I took the bait without noticing the hook. I was caught, and I would be lose my freedom in exchange for a paycheck, a paycheck that was the only was to avoid being crushed by the cloud of debt that would soon hang over me. | | | Enlightenment | |
<
< | With a little “encouragement,” I was able to see that there was an “inside.” I came to realize that my perceptions of developing power and skill were accurate, but it wasn’t my power and skill that was going to be developed. I was fuel, and I would fuel others development in exchange for a paycheck. It didn’t take long before I began to wonder what exactly it was that occupied the outside of this unappealing box. It hit me all at once, like a train, like my ideas tend to. I didn’t merely realize ephemeral possibilities - I realized my future options, and they were more than I thought. I realized that in two years, I do not need to work for a law firm to pay off my crushing student debts. I do not even need to work for a law firm to further develop my skills and power. I can, if I happen to find one that suits my needs, but only if I find that it will be a useful relationship for me in my development. I have never been the type to self-doubt, and would like to think that I am less risk averse than most (but who wouldn’t). More than teaching me any sort of learned helplessness, the indoctrination of law school had blinded me. Then I opened my eyes. I realized that part of developing my skills is seeing the best path for development. The mass “submit application here,” process does not always lead to the best path, and I have reached the point in my life where I may need to find my own.
My Fulfillment
Finally I come to my fulfillment. This is where the outside is unclear. I know that it exists, but I do not yet know what it contains. I know that I want to help people. My original plan was to develop all the skills and power that I could, then go off and help people. Then I heard something that made me reconsider. “Know what is enough.” I never have. I know this about myself, and I would never stop. I realized that I was trapping myself into a life of pursuing becoming the perfect means, and never affecting any end. Having the potential to do great things is no better than having the potential to do terrible things, either way nothing is changed. I understood that my development must also be active progress toward my goals. I could not separate them. | >
> | With a little “encouragement,” I was able to see that I had been fooled. I realized that my outlandish professor wasn’t trying to demoralize or dishearten me, but was trying to show me that I was going down a path I didn’t intend – and I didn’t have to continue. I came to see there were nearly infinite options before me. There were many other ways to make money and develop myself as a lawyer, and how foolish had I been to ever think that there weren’t. I still could work for a law firm, if I happened to find one that suited my needs and would foster my development, but I had a choice. I have never been the type to self-doubt, and would like to think that I am less risk averse than most (but who wouldn’t), but the indoctrination of law school had blinded me. Then I opened my eyes. The mass “submit application here,” process does not always lead to the best path, and I had reached the point in my life where I may need to find my own. | | | | |
>
> | My original plan was to maximize my potential skill and power, then go off and help people. Then I heard something that made me reconsider. “Know what is enough.” Personally, I never have. I knew that if I pursued this tactic I would become trapped in the cycle of creating a perfect resume, and that when I finally decided to apply myself to helping people I would have absolutely no practical skills. An even worse possibility was that eventually I would wake up exhausted and unsatisfied, and realize that I had done nothing other than make myself into a useful tool. I realized that to spend more time developing my potential without actually doing anything was a waste. Now, it is time for me to start helping people, and to find a way to develop my skills and power along the way. Having the potential to do great things means next to nothing if that potential is never realized. | | | My Path | |
<
< | Now that I understand my path of development more clearly, I can begin to focus on what type of help it is that I would like to supply. I am naturally drawn to criminal defense because of my opportunities to witness such injustices. However, I would like to think I have become enlightened enough to realize that there are many other options. I know that whatever I choose, I want to make a difference in the world, and that changing one man’s life can have the same effect whether through a criminal proceeding or some other means, which brings me to my final revelation. | >
> | Now that I understand my path more clearly, I can begin to focus on where exactly I would like that path to lead me. I am naturally drawn to criminal defense because of injustices I have witnessed in that field. My brief experience thus far working with the Federal Defender has reinforced this belief. The motivation that I feel knowing that my efforts can change someone’s life is exactly the passion that I had hoped to experience when I found my profession. However, I would like to think I have become enlightened enough to realize that there are always other options. I know that whatever I choose, I want to make a difference in the world. There are many ways to change one man’s life; a criminal proceeding is only one, which brings me to my final revelation.
Perhaps it is not my role to change one life at a time, although, it is certainly rewarding and it is where I will start, both this summer and next year as I work with the Harlem Defenders. Just as I have begun to see outside the law school bubble of oppressive loans and law firms, I have begun trying to see outside my personal views. The effect that can be had on a single person is profound. However, what if everyone thinks the same way? The system is broken, and I must decide if I will play within the rules, or change them. This is the question that I will continue to explore for the rest of my time in law school, and perhaps long after. Maybe helping one person at a time is selfish of me, it certainly is rewarding, even with the small effects I have had thus far. However, I cannot think of a better way to develop my skills and power while I search for my own way to best impact the world. | | | | |
<
< | Perhaps it is not my role to change one life at a time. Just as I have begun to see outside the law school bubble of oppressive loans and law firms, I have started to see outside my personal views. I have always thought that what I would like to do is make my difference by helping one person at a time, because I think it is rewarding to see short term, individualized results. The effect that can be had on a single person with little effort is profound. However, what if everyone else thinks the same way? The system is broken, and I must decide if I will play within the rules, or change the system. This is the question that I will be exploring for the rest of my time in law school, and perhaps after. I hope to find some answers this summer while working for the federal defender, but even if I don’t I will “see” from yet another angle. | | | |
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BrianHoovenSecondPaper 2 - 16 Jun 2013 - Main.EbenMoglen
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<
< | Skill, Power, & Fufillment | >
> | Skill, Power, & Fulfillment | | | | |
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< | I. Introduction | >
> | Introduction | | | “Power, skill, and fulfillment.” Ever since my last-minute transition from medicine into law, I have known that was what I wanted to get out of my professional life. For me, power and skill are closely related, and each is a means to an end. I consider power to be the set of all those external conditions, money, connections, and status that are helpful to achieve one’s ends. Skill is the set of all the internal resources like perception, persuasion, and efficiency with power. Fulfillment is a more difficult concept for me. I have always known that I wanted to help people, hence my original draw to medical school. However, the medical field simply had no appeal to me beyond its opportunity to help people. Thus I pursued my passion in philosophy and argument, and went to law school, where the opportunity to develop my skills, and be placed in a position to attain power, greatly appealed to me. And I hoped that I would be able to find fulfillment. | |
<
< | II. Law School Blinders | >
> | Law School Blinders | | | My first semester in law school played a nasty trick on me, for the first time, I failed to realize that there was an “outside.” I was trapped inside this very carefully constructed world that promised skill and power through prestigious professors and lofty salaries. This was made worse by the fact that I thought I did see the “outside.” I thought by seeing through all the feel-good assemblies, and realizing that the law school was, in its most basic form, a business designed to package us, that I saw through the veil. I understood that I was a product being made, and I was okay with it because I would be made into a skillful powerful attorney. I arrogantly thought that I was already seeing outside. I was wrong. | |
<
< | III. Enlightenment | >
> | Enlightenment | | | With a little “encouragement,” I was able to see that there was an “inside.” I came to realize that my perceptions of developing power and skill were accurate, but it wasn’t my power and skill that was going to be developed. I was fuel, and I would fuel others development in exchange for a paycheck. It didn’t take long before I began to wonder what exactly it was that occupied the outside of this unappealing box. It hit me all at once, like a train, like my ideas tend to. I didn’t merely realize ephemeral possibilities - I realized my future options, and they were more than I thought. I realized that in two years, I do not need to work for a law firm to pay off my crushing student debts. I do not even need to work for a law firm to further develop my skills and power. I can, if I happen to find one that suits my needs, but only if I find that it will be a useful relationship for me in my development. I have never been the type to self-doubt, and would like to think that I am less risk averse than most (but who wouldn’t). More than teaching me any sort of learned helplessness, the indoctrination of law school had blinded me. Then I opened my eyes. I realized that part of developing my skills is seeing the best path for development. The mass “submit application here,” process does not always lead to the best path, and I have reached the point in my life where I may need to find my own. | |
<
< | IV. My Fulfillment | >
> | My Fulfillment | | | Finally I come to my fulfillment. This is where the outside is unclear. I know that it exists, but I do not yet know what it contains. I know that I want to help people. My original plan was to develop all the skills and power that I could, then go off and help people. Then I heard something that made me reconsider. “Know what is enough.” I never have. I know this about myself, and I would never stop. I realized that I was trapping myself into a life of pursuing becoming the perfect means, and never affecting any end. Having the potential to do great things is no better than having the potential to do terrible things, either way nothing is changed. I understood that my development must also be active progress toward my goals. I could not separate them. | |
<
< | V. My Path | >
> | My Path | | | Now that I understand my path of development more clearly, I can begin to focus on what type of help it is that I would like to supply. I am naturally drawn to criminal defense because of my opportunities to witness such injustices. However, I would like to think I have become enlightened enough to realize that there are many other options. I know that whatever I choose, I want to make a difference in the world, and that changing one man’s life can have the same effect whether through a criminal proceeding or some other means, which brings me to my final revelation. | | |
-- BrianHooven - 08 Apr 2013 | |
>
> |
A little grandiose in
spots, where some editing for modesty may come to seem to you like a
good idea when you read it over again years from now. But otherwise
not a bad statement of youthful bravado and the onset of commitment.
Let's see how it and you wear together....
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BrianHoovenSecondPaper 1 - 08 Apr 2013 - Main.BrianHooven
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Skill, Power, & Fufillment
I. Introduction
“Power, skill, and fulfillment.” Ever since my last-minute transition from medicine into law, I have known that was what I wanted to get out of my professional life. For me, power and skill are closely related, and each is a means to an end. I consider power to be the set of all those external conditions, money, connections, and status that are helpful to achieve one’s ends. Skill is the set of all the internal resources like perception, persuasion, and efficiency with power. Fulfillment is a more difficult concept for me. I have always known that I wanted to help people, hence my original draw to medical school. However, the medical field simply had no appeal to me beyond its opportunity to help people. Thus I pursued my passion in philosophy and argument, and went to law school, where the opportunity to develop my skills, and be placed in a position to attain power, greatly appealed to me. And I hoped that I would be able to find fulfillment.
II. Law School Blinders
My first semester in law school played a nasty trick on me, for the first time, I failed to realize that there was an “outside.” I was trapped inside this very carefully constructed world that promised skill and power through prestigious professors and lofty salaries. This was made worse by the fact that I thought I did see the “outside.” I thought by seeing through all the feel-good assemblies, and realizing that the law school was, in its most basic form, a business designed to package us, that I saw through the veil. I understood that I was a product being made, and I was okay with it because I would be made into a skillful powerful attorney. I arrogantly thought that I was already seeing outside. I was wrong.
III. Enlightenment
With a little “encouragement,” I was able to see that there was an “inside.” I came to realize that my perceptions of developing power and skill were accurate, but it wasn’t my power and skill that was going to be developed. I was fuel, and I would fuel others development in exchange for a paycheck. It didn’t take long before I began to wonder what exactly it was that occupied the outside of this unappealing box. It hit me all at once, like a train, like my ideas tend to. I didn’t merely realize ephemeral possibilities - I realized my future options, and they were more than I thought. I realized that in two years, I do not need to work for a law firm to pay off my crushing student debts. I do not even need to work for a law firm to further develop my skills and power. I can, if I happen to find one that suits my needs, but only if I find that it will be a useful relationship for me in my development. I have never been the type to self-doubt, and would like to think that I am less risk averse than most (but who wouldn’t). More than teaching me any sort of learned helplessness, the indoctrination of law school had blinded me. Then I opened my eyes. I realized that part of developing my skills is seeing the best path for development. The mass “submit application here,” process does not always lead to the best path, and I have reached the point in my life where I may need to find my own.
IV. My Fulfillment
Finally I come to my fulfillment. This is where the outside is unclear. I know that it exists, but I do not yet know what it contains. I know that I want to help people. My original plan was to develop all the skills and power that I could, then go off and help people. Then I heard something that made me reconsider. “Know what is enough.” I never have. I know this about myself, and I would never stop. I realized that I was trapping myself into a life of pursuing becoming the perfect means, and never affecting any end. Having the potential to do great things is no better than having the potential to do terrible things, either way nothing is changed. I understood that my development must also be active progress toward my goals. I could not separate them.
V. My Path
Now that I understand my path of development more clearly, I can begin to focus on what type of help it is that I would like to supply. I am naturally drawn to criminal defense because of my opportunities to witness such injustices. However, I would like to think I have become enlightened enough to realize that there are many other options. I know that whatever I choose, I want to make a difference in the world, and that changing one man’s life can have the same effect whether through a criminal proceeding or some other means, which brings me to my final revelation.
Perhaps it is not my role to change one life at a time. Just as I have begun to see outside the law school bubble of oppressive loans and law firms, I have started to see outside my personal views. I have always thought that what I would like to do is make my difference by helping one person at a time, because I think it is rewarding to see short term, individualized results. The effect that can be had on a single person with little effort is profound. However, what if everyone else thinks the same way? The system is broken, and I must decide if I will play within the rules, or change the system. This is the question that I will be exploring for the rest of my time in law school, and perhaps after. I hope to find some answers this summer while working for the federal defender, but even if I don’t I will “see” from yet another angle.
-- BrianHooven - 08 Apr 2013 |
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