Introduction

Living in a broken home is a situation that definitely impacts young people in the United States.

• This is an intense, personal and powerful essay. It should not begin with a truism rendered in flat monotone.

As an adolescent, a lot of my friends grew up in homes without a parent, mainly missing a father. I do not have to analyze this from the outside looking in because I grew up in Brooklyn, New York without my father at home.

• These two sentences are also repetitive and flat. You can gain space and music at once by combining them: "When I was younger, in Brooklyn [did you need this?], most of my friends came from broken homes, which--having no father at home myself--I understood."

For some, living with only one parent can be a burden while for others it can be a benefit. I will analyze both the burdens and benefits of growing up in a broken home and will show that there are more benefits than one may think.

• Try the same process on these two yourself. Fixing these five sentences will gain you space to be used later, and will give you some resonance from the outset, which an essay like this one needs.

The Term "Broken Home"

First, an analysis of the term "broken home" may be in order. A broken home seems to hold a negative connotation. The term broke implies that something is not the way it should be.

• Those three sentences should be one. The verb is "to break."

A broken home does not have to refer to a single-parent home. Children living in a house where their parents fight all the time may be in a broken home. However, the ‘nuclear family’ is thought to consist of two parents, therefore a house without both parents is referred to as broken. Why does a child raised solely by his/her mother have to be from a broken home? Who says that a child raised solely by his/her mother has any worse of an upbringing than a child raised by both parents. These questions will be dealt with, but first the burdens children face being raised by a single-parent must be addressed.

• You are missing a question mark, which implies inadequate proofreading. Because the verb "to break" is transitive, we get from our language's structure that a broken home is a home someone has broken. Some homes are broken by one adult, some by two. When homes have been made smaller by the death of a parent (as is common in postwar periods) they aren't called "broken," and thus the children of widows in the 1920s or the 1950s weren't thought of as growing up in "broken" homes. But we were a non-divorcing culture until the late 1950s, really until the 1960s, and so homes transformed by divorce were considered to have been broken by the divorcing partner. Children raised in angry or addicted or otherwise--to use the contemporary term--"dysfunctional" homes are not considered to be raised in broken homes, with your passive-voice connotation of "broken." Your questions are valuable, but you could have gone further with more sensitivity to the very language you were questioning.

The Burdens of a Broken Home

My parents separated when I was six years old. As a young boy, with a four year old brother and one year old sister, I did not know what was taking place. My mother, siblings, and I moved out of the house we shared with my father and moved to a new house in a different Brooklyn neighborhood. Living as a single-parent with three children, my mother needed to work overtime to make ends meet. Therefore, I was placed in the position of helping to care for my younger siblings. I was given keys to our house and the responsibility of watching my younger siblings after day care and school let out. Safe to say, it is not normal practice in American society for a pre-pubescent child to babysit children even younger than him. I lost out on the opportunity to take part in after school programs, play in the park after school, and attend slumber parties at friends’ houses.

• Should have been "he." You need to be very careful to catch grammatical problems when you proofread, because simple grammar failures often set people against you at first impression. Even though people know you to be well-educated, they will take a grammar failure as a mark against intellect, rather than merely a sign of carelessness, which would be bad enough. It's easy to proofread, and hard to correct the bias of a first impression proofreading could have prevented.

• In the last sentence here, I'd have considered, instead of listing things missed, saying that what you lost was childhood.

I believe that most of all I lost out on the opportunity to have my father around every day. Throughout my growth as an adolescent, I did not have my father to learn from.

• Not entirely consistent with saying three sentences later that he's always been a good parent. The tensions and angers of your situation are largely left out of the ostensible text of this essay, but having been repressed in the account, and perhaps in life, they can be occasionally glimpsed, as here, as a conflict literally between the lines.

I think that young boys learn how to be mature, young men from simply living in the same house as their father. This is assuming that their father is a good male role model and parent. Although my parents separated, divorced, and my father remarried, he has always been a good role model and parent.

• These three sentences could be combined, as at the top. But the repetition of the closing phrase of sentences 2 and 3 feels as though it contains a message: the repetition turns the epithet into artifice, a formula, which acts to undercut what it proclaims. Again, a marker buoy for feelings sunk below the surface?

Life would have been very different if he lived in the same house for more than the first six years of my childhood. I never had the opportunity to watch my parents interact on a daily basis, which would have given me a first-hand view of relationships and marriage. Instead, I lived through constant fighting and feeling like I was stuck in the middle of my parents’ divorce. Children forced to live without one parent are burdened with the task of trying to figure out what is taking place without the mental capacity to actually understand.

• All children are burdened with that task with respect to some of the emotional events they witness and participate in. The consequences of those encounters between children's determination to keep themselves safe and the threats posed by circumstances they don't and can't fully understand is what makes adult psychotherapy valuable and life-changing but increasingly and unnecessarily prohibitively expensive experience.

The Benefits of a Broken Home

The burdens of living in a broken home may seem bleak, but there are more benefits than I ever previously considered. I learned about the strength of a woman because of my parents’ divorce. My mother showed the ability to work, work overtime, and still make sure that her children were well cared for. She established that you can overcome any obstacle in life and be successful. She dedicated much of her life to giving us the things she never had. I cannot remember a summer break where we did not take a great vacation. Our vacations allowed us to learn about new cultures while solidifying our familial bonds.

One of the best feelings in life is overcoming expected failure. No one expected my mother to be able to make it on her own, but she proved people wrong. She successfully raised three children by herself, making sure that we all received good educations. Her hard work led to me and my siblings all going to college. The values instilled in me by my mother helped me persevere through the challenges of life.

Although I wish my father was in our home, I cannot say that I am not stronger because of my upbringing. My parents’ divorce helped to build character. I may have matured faster than I wanted to, but I also gained an appreciation for the importance of a good education, hard work, and close family ties. I learned early on how to care for others and be a selfless individual. My siblings look up to me because I was always there for them. As a teenager, I was directly exposed to the legal system because of my parents’ custody battle. My siblings and I were assigned a child advocate who represented our interests only. This event helped pique my interest in law as a career.

Conclusion

Children, like me, struggle adjusting to their parents’ divorce. However, the negative impact is often apparent. Ideally, I wish that my parents never divorced, but I cannot say that my life has been harmed by it. My situation shows that there can be a positive impact that you may not consider when first placed in the situation of being raised in a single-parent home.

The Burdens and Benefits of a Broken Home (Edited and ready for final review)

Introduction

Growing up in Brooklyn, New York without my father at home, I understood what most of my friends lived through. Living in a broken home was a struggle that impacts me to this day. Although the burden of living with one parent after a divorce may be apparent, there can be hidden benefits. The benefits may not outweigh the burden, but analyzing both allows for a fuller picture of my personal growth and that of many others.

The Term Broken Home

A broken home seems to hold a negative connotation. The term “to break” implies that something is not the way it should be. A household where the parents fight all the time is considered to be dysfunctional. However, maybe it should be considered broken because children are being raised in a argumentative environment and things are not the way they ought to be. The ‘nuclear family’ is thought to consist of two parents. Therefore a household divided by divorce is referred to as broken. Why does a child raised solely by his/her mother, after divorce, have to be from a broken home? Who says that a child raised solely by his/her mother, after divorce, has any worse of an upbringing than a child raised by both parents? Why the need for the term broken in the first place? These questions will be dealt with, but first the burdens children face being raised by a single-parent must be addressed.

The Burdens of a Broken Home

My parents separated when I was six years old. As a young boy, with a four year old brother and one year old sister, I did not know what was taking place. My mother, siblings, and I moved out of the house we shared with my father and moved to a new house in a different Brooklyn neighborhood. Living as a single-parent with three children, my mother needed to work overtime to make ends meet. Therefore, I was placed in the position of helping to care for my younger siblings. I was given keys to our house and the responsibility of watching my younger siblings after day care and school let out. Safe to say, it is not normal practice in American society for a pre-pubescent child to babysit children even younger than he. I simply lost out on my childhood.

I believe that most of all I lost out on the opportunity to have my father around every day. Throughout my growth as an adolescent, I did not have my father to learn from. I think that young boys learn how to be mature, young men from simply living in the same house as their father. This is assuming that their father is a good male role model and parent. Although my parents separated, divorced, and my father remarried, he has always been a good role model and parent. However, the assertion that my father has been a good role model and parent does show the burden I still bear in wishing that I lived with both of my parents. Life would have been very different if he lived in the same house for more than the first six years of my childhood. I never had the opportunity to watch my parents interact on a daily basis, which would have given me a first-hand view of relationships and marriage. Instead, I lived through constant fighting and feeling like I was stuck in the middle of my parents’ divorce. Children forced to live without one parent are burdened with the task of trying to figure out what is taking place without the mental capacity to actually understand.

The Benefits of a Broken Home

The burdens of living in a broken home may seem bleak, but there are more benefits than I ever previously considered. I learned about the strength of a woman because of my parents’ divorce. My mother showed the ability to work, work overtime, and still make sure that her children were well cared for. She established that you can overcome any obstacle in life and be successful. She dedicated much of her life to giving us the things she never had. I cannot remember a summer break where we did not take a great vacation. Our vacations allowed us to learn about new cultures while solidifying our familial bonds.

One of the best feelings in life is overcoming expected failure. No one expected my mother to be able to make it on her own, but she proved people wrong. She successfully raised three children by herself, making sure that we all received good educations. Her hard work led to me and my siblings all going to college. The values instilled in me by my mother helped me persevere through the challenges of life.

Although I wish my father was in our home, I cannot say that I am not stronger because of my upbringing. My parents’ divorce helped to build character. I may have matured faster than I wanted to, but I also gained an appreciation for the importance of a good education, hard work, and close family ties. I learned early on how to care for others and be a selfless individual. My siblings look up to me because I was always there for them. As a teenager, I was directly exposed to the legal system because of my parents’ custody battle. My siblings and I were assigned a child advocate who represented our interests only. This event helped pique my interest in law as a career.

Conclusion

Children, like me, struggle adjusting to their parents’ divorce. However, the negative impact is often apparent. Ideally, I wish that my parents never divorced, but I cannot say that my life has been harmed by it. My situation shows that there can be a positive impact that you may not consider when first placed in the situation of being raised in a single-parent home.