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The Serpent, Simian, and Stockholm Syndrome: An Alternative Fairy Tale

-- By MeronWerkneh - 01 Apr 2016

In a realm—one father than you can imagine, and yet closer than you think—there was a land called Auldania. Though it was still relatively young, Auldania distinguished itself from the other lands in the realm because it remained the most enchanting place to live. Gilded with a meticulously and recklessly crafted image of opulence, Auldania attracted creatures from many lands who wanted to indulge in the gifts it had to offer.

It was too good to be true. It was Shangri-la, with a hint of A.1.

And so the creatures lived. They lived, died, laughed and loved, earned and lost, fought and dreamed. They mostly fought. But they were content, because at day’s end, there was nowhere else that they would rather be. You see, there was something else particularly special about Auldania that the creatures knew they could not find elsewhere: their talismans. Everyone in the land had a talisman that protected them wherever they went. Bestowed upon them at birth, the creatures bore these talismans as badges of honor, symbolizing their coveted positions in the greatest land of all time.

Again, it was too good to be true. Utopia, with a side of bacon (extra crispy).

Now unbeknownst to creatures, there were other forces at work in Auldania—dastardly, deadly forces that proceeded undetected. This brings us to the Wizards. The Wizards were cunning and crafty creatures who used their magic to control Auldania and all its inhabitants. Their ultimate goal was to take the thing that the creatures loved the most—their talismans. However, there is an age-old rule that talismans cannot be taken forcefully; they must be surrendered. To make matters more complicated, the Wizards could not use their magic to force the creatures into surrendering their talismans because their magic was bound by the Great Scroll. To achieve their feat, then, the Wizards had to get creative.

“Never! It will never happen!”

“Ease yourself, Artemus. Why do you yell?”

“It is impossible! The creatures will never willingly give up their talismans—even the greatest of fools would not surrender the one thing that keeps them safe!”

“On the contrary, it is very possible and quite simple. All we have to do is ask.”

“Ask, you say? Really? Well, now I understand…that you have gone completely mad. Simply asking someone to do something that they will never want to do will not compel them to do it!”

“But it will—if you ask them the right way.”

Growing weary of his cryptic responses, Artemus asked Pineus to show him what it was that he was planning. Gazing out of the tower window, Pineus began to speak.

“There has been much unrest in the land, because the creatures want a leader. Things are falling apart because there is much division and anger, and the creatures want someone they can trust to lead them. So, we will find them a leader. An excellent leader. Who will hand the talismans right over to us.

“You see Artemus, fear is a funny thing. Once a creature is imbued with fear, it will do and accede to things it never would otherwise. It goes into survival mode, willing to sacrifice almost anything to rid themselves of that fear and feel safe once more. Anything—even their talismans.

“This has proved true for as many ages as we have existed. During the Dark Era, when the creatures learned that we were using our magic to control them and seize their talismans, they were outraged. Then, once we conjured those beasts from the deep and assured them that our controlling them was only to protect their talismans from the beasts, they subsided. What’s more—they banished the one that exposed what we were doing! Banished him! You see, we simply created a threat—we created fear—and they were willing to let us control them. So as I have said, naive Artemus, it is quite simple.

“This is what will be done. The creatures of Aldania will select a leader. Only, it will not go as you think…”

After time spent searching, debating and deliberating, the creatures of Aldania—with the occasional magical nudge—found two contenders for Leader: the serpent and the ape. Now, neither of them were attractive choices initially, but they had generated enough anxiety at the thought of their opponent being Leader that they gained support by default. Although the creatures did not trust the serpent, finding it to be conniving and underhanded, it presented itself well and was an engaging and persuasive speaker. Conversely, the ape, though volatile and brutish, had a reputation for being tough and relentless. And eventually, the creatures found the feces-flinging to be quite entertaining.

And so it appeared that the Wizards had outwitted the Auldinians once more. It is unclear who became Leader, but it did not much matter to the Wizards. For their plunder, the beloved talismans, were soon to arrive—and all with the creatures' consent.

For fear, it seems, is a funny thing indeed.

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